Where Are Your Wings?

today if you feel depressed
remember, we all get that way
how can you be human and not
feel like this at times

so pamper yourself,be kind to yourself
and after that, know you are blessed
and try and see the beauty rather than the ugly
try and understand you are here for a purpose
and I doubt it has anything to do with being
a negative influence in the world or that you are here
simply to suffer and sacrifice

see what you are, really are
unique, important, stop ignoring your wings,
they are there, look for them, stop hiding them,
use them...do not be content to remain grounded
when you have the ability to fly
so do it, soar...at least try.

Breast Cancer Survivor

I would willingly
go through all of it
all over again
if it meant my daughter
would not have to go through
the same thing one day

I would willingly
go through all of it
all over again
if no one had to do so

but all I can do
is continue to pray
and to hope for a cure
and to believe that one day
it will come
and that until that day
we all must remain
Angelic Warriors
swords in hand
Faith in heart
and forever remembering
those whose fight has ended

I would willingly
go through all of it again
if it meant it could keep
another from having to suffer
or lose the battle
but I remain
as many , just another warrior
another survivor
and as such
send out daily prayers
to everyone effected by breast Cancer
and to God I beg, please bring
a cure soon.
please Lord.

Christmas Day

So here we it is finally Christmas Day
daughter still fast asleep,remember when
she was small could not wait to get up
and see what Santa brought
now still waiting to open gift up
things sure do change don't they

one thing remains the same
family, friends, our faith in our Lord
and hopefully in one another
remains vital part of our lives
as it should be anyway

wishing everyone a magical Christmas
and a New Year that brings true and lasting
joy.

Most of all, I wish all of you Gods' grace
and mercy and blessings
and more love than you can imagine.

Lorrie
xmas 2011

You Believe

You believe it will stop
never happen again
you believe it is somehow
your fault,yet you just can't
figure out exactly why

you believe it is just
a type of temporary insanity
that will soon pass
a bad memory that will fade like dust

you believe you should stay
for the children,for yourself,
for someone else
for all the reasons you can
come up with to justify
your reality

you believe
it's best not to make waves
that silence is golden
keep the family together
keep the secret at all cost

there was a time
when I was like you
I believed too
like so many, many others do

the bruises
the cuts
the broken bones
the shattered pieces
of lives that is touched by the hands of abuse

hard to believe
those same hands
once,long ago,brought passion
gentleness, a promise of joy
once reaching out to embrace
with respect and love
suddenly those same hands
striking out with a force that seems impossible
to live through
down,down,down again you fall
lost in a void of confusion,distrust,rage
sadness and pain
fear and uncertainty
what will each day or night bring
the all consuming ,endless nightmare
you can't seem to wake up from
you believe it will end
but hear me....it won't , I promise you
it won't
not until you can speak the words
mean the words...enough, no more
not now, not ever again
silence is not golden
abuse is not acceptable
wounds do mend but scars still remain

you believe
it will stop
well, as one who has been there
and who walked beside others
who were there,
I beg of you, trust me, hear me
abuse of any type will not suddenly stop
unless it finally destroys you
or you finally, pray God, finally
get up ,stand up,face up,wake up
and walk.


there is no excuse
for abuse.

18

Dear Daughter
just want to say that 18
isn't a magic number

it is the right to passage
from teen to young adult

it is also a number which can get you
into more trouble than the years before

you are held accountable
credit wise,law wise,common sense wise
money wise,morally wise...

you must mindful of your actions
careful of your choices
for now, they do belong to you

I remain on the sideline
should you need advice
I remain in your corner
should you need someone to turn to

You think of the freedom
I think of the possible negatives
that it can bring
trusting you will think before you act
and still listen as well as speak your mind

18 not legally able to drink
but legally considered an adult
scares me I must admit
all that you can open yourself up to
praying that you are ready

I cherish the baby days
the child days
made it through the young teen days
now here we are at the age of adulthood
and I am the one who seems not quite ready

nonetheless, I give you my prayers
I give you my respect, my heart,my faith,my endless devotion
and even though it is hard...I give you your wings
which I have held in care for you until now.

I ask Dear Daughter, only that you use them not only to fly
but to Soar.

love,mama

For Mama

Fly with wings of eagles brave
rest when moonlight gives quiet passage
safe and at peace in the company
of Angels.

In memory of Jacqueline Lee Bourne
returned to Heaven, Oct. 29 2006

In our thoughts and in our hearts we hold you close.

Silver Strands

As I think back
on the last day
we were together
I recall so many tiny things
each large in their own way

I think about how hard I wished
to look into your beautiful eyes
just one more time
those beautiful eyes
so blue , so full of emotion

I recall holding your hand
so tiny and slender your fingers
at rest within my own
oh how I prayed to feel the tightening of your grip

I watched as your chest
would rise and fall with each breath
and I began to sing to you
every song I could possibly remember
in hope to bring you comfort

I stared at your soft and beautiful face
and recall each long and glowing
silver strand of your hair
thinking how peaceful you looked
how truly angelic in those last moments

I remember how you use to be a redhead
and a blonde and even a brunette in the years
long past, and I could not help but think
that of all those colors,my favorite would
remain, those silver shining strands.

Angel

Beloved mother
sweet Angel
watching us from above
sometimes I smell your perfume
and even think I see your face

I sometimes
still find myself
reaching for the phone
to dial your number
suddenly remembering
you aren't home.

There are times
when I swear I feel
you touch my hand
or whisper softly
in my ear
and I pray with all my heart and soul
that you too can also feel me near.

Thoughts of You

It takes
merely the mention
of your name
to bring me to tears

It feels
like just yesterday
you returned to Heaven
yet Oct.29th
marks five ,swift passing years.
I miss you so much mama.

Mamas Prayers

You may not have
always said your prayers
on bended knee
but I am certain that
many of the prayers you whispered
you did so for me

You were not one
to go to church every Sunday
and often you questioned
your faith

nonetheless
you prayed to God
in the quiet hours of the night
and believed your prayers did reach Him
and in doing so gave others the hope
that theirs did too.

Shadow

Your shadow
visited the hallway
of my mind today
but as I reached out
to take your hand
you quickly faded away

I know I must accept
that you had to leave
but there is such a pain and sorrow
that remains in me
that I doubt will ever fully end

Your spirit
visited my heart today
and oh how I wished
that you could have stayed.

There is no freedom
from the prisons
we build for ourselves
and refuse to walk away from.

Time

Careful not to reach
so hard for tomorrow
that you find you have
ignored the moment.

Memory

If someday I am unable
to remember my loved ones,
I pray they still
will remember me.

If you find yourself
unable to speak
the truth...
speak nothing.

Angels Whisper

Trust
have faith unshaken

Pray
Believe
in the power of the universe

And in yourself

Reach
up to the heavens
when you are facing the lions

When thunder is at it's loudest
and lightning fiercely strikes

Hear the angels whisper?
Do not doubt you are in their company

Know that you are one of them

Hear them whisper
know that they watch over you

Lorrie Salvetti 6/2011

For my Husband

You
are my only love
my hero
not because you try to be
but simply because you can't
be anything less to me

It is no wonder why I love you
it's just the way things are
your love has made beautiful
that which for so long had been
alone and scarred

Abandoned

I have often wondered
if we should happen
to pass one another on the street
and should our eyes just happen to meet


Would you recognize me...
though we're strangers in most every way
would you father, know me, your child,
somehow, some way


I wonder...
I try not to, but nonetheless,
I admit I very often do.
Would you find in a glimpse of me
some forgotten, abandoned part of you?


I still wonder,
and often ponder...
after all these years have past us by
if you've ever wonder too?


Whatever happened to
that abandoned child
who shares only DNA,
and a name
with you.

armor

I realize
I can not, nor should not
fight my daughters battles,
but admit ,nonetheless, I still wear a coat of armor
just in case she should need my help.

In a blink of the eye
she has become a young woman
and I must continue to learn to give her wings
to fly on her own, but I find it so difficult to do.
I will be diligent in this necessary task
but again I admit...I don't like it.
People have told me over and over again
time will fly by, how very true that is.
My baby is almost 18 now
and before long will venture out into the world
as I remain behind, hoping I did my best to prepare her
and that she will always remember how loved she is.
Being her mother is the greatest honor I ever known.

Grandfather

Very early
every morning
grandfather would rise
long before anyone else

He would quietly walk down
the hallway careful not to disturb
the slumber of the rest of the household

I would keep my eyes closed
pretending to still be asleep
as he stopped to peek in on me

I did this as I knew this time was
special for him and I knew if he found
me awake he would stay to visit with me
rather than continue on his way

After finding me still asleep
grandfather continued slowly down
the stairway and into the kitchen
where he started a pot of coffee

Very strong
the aroma would fill the house
like sunshine
pouring through an open window

After pouring himself a cup of Joe
as he called it
he would step into the den
and start a warm fire

He then would go to the front door
and get the newspaper,
finding it somewhere between the porch
and the end of the driveway

As he sipped his coffee
he would glance up every once in awhile
to see if anyone had risen

I would remain in my room picturing him
knowing his morning ritual so well
like a special fairy tale
I was told and memorized in detail

I could tell when he finished reading his paper
as he would roll it back up
placing the rubber band back around
as if it had never been touched

Placing it on the hallway table
walking back to the kitchen for another cup of coffee
I could hear him open the cabinet

Shortly thereafter, I could hear
the toaster popping up his toast
I could hear him still trying to be so quiet
and thought how very considerate he was

After a bit I could hear
the running water as he washed his dishes
and put them into the drainboard.

When he was finished i would hear
his footsteps return to the den where
he would turn on the radio very low
He'd close his eyes as he sat in his easy chair
feet propped on a cushioned stool

I could easily see him as I ventured
halfway down the stairs
stopping to sit and watch him

I always found him so interesting
his figure tall and slim his features rugged
yet he had such a gentleness about him
His smile was like a rainbow after a storm
always so comforting to me

Grandfather came to live with us
after grandmother passed away
My parents insisted the ranch they lived on
was far too large and lonely
for him to stay there without her
He agreed and this was something
we were all glad about

Grandfather was American Indian
and very proud of his heritage
whenever he would tell us stories
it was like honey from his lips
every word leaving you hungry for more

Each day I would wait
for his ritual to be complete
and then walk down the stairs
and join him in the den

He always greeted me
with a kiss upon the cheek
and I always greeted him
with a big hug and kiss in return
and we would sit awhile and chat
while we waited for the others to rise

I recall my grandfathers deep blue eyes
and as I listened to him speak
it was impossible not to journey within them
able to walk the paths of his life
learning from his wisdom
blessed by his spirit

Grandfather passed away a few years ago
quietly in his sleep and i believe beyond a doubt
that grandmother was by his side

Sometimes early
very early in the morning
I think I hear my grandfather's footsteps in the hallway
while my husband and my children are fast asleep

At times can even smell the coffee brewing
the aroma filling up the house
like an old friend dropping by
it brings me such a comfort

I quietly walk down the stairs to the kitchen
and sipping a cup of "Joe"
I smile and I whisper
good morning grandfather
good morning grandmother
I know you are near me
I miss you
and always, I will love you

(a story I wrote in a dream)

Mirror

There was a time when
I looked into a mirror
and didn't like who I saw

There was a time when
I looked into a mirror
and prayed no one else saw me

There was a time when
I looked into a mirror
and knew no one else saw me

There was a time when
I looked into a mirror
and didn't care who saw me

There was a time when
I looked into a mirror
and found very little of myself

There was a time when
I looked into a mirror
wishing I could be someone else

Anyone else

There was a time when
I looked into a mirror
and began to wonder who I used to be

Who I never used to be

Who I never should have been
and I wondered
who shall I become

There was a time when
I looked into a mirror
feeling there was not much looking back

But eventually
there came a time when
the reflection became far more
than I could have ever imagined

I looked into a mirror and I found
not one, but two reflections

A grown woman...a mother
the other a child...my child

And together the reflection became
a constant confirmation
of the beauty in life and the power
of Gods infinite grace

Through her eyes I see
limitless potential
endless possibilities
the manifestation of prayers
so long ago whispered
in the quiet darkness of night

Dear Lord

Please hear me

Please see me

Please take my hand

Please send me an Angel

And so he did
And I named her Cheyenne

And whenever i look into a mirror
I see a woman full of hope and love
thankful for the many blessings in her life

Dear Mama,
so hard to believe you have been gone
for almost five years

today is your birthday
I lit a candle in your honor
I miss and love you beyond words
Happy Birthday my precious mother.